these songs could never let you know the way i really feel
because i don’t know how to express myself, or if all of is real
or shit i made up- like my mother always said.
i can’t take my medication because i spend too much time drinking,
and in the morning i get lonely because people hang in threes and
i’m a fourth or a fifth degree friend.
and then i go back to my room, lay on the rug, and lock the door,
and think about the way i smiled, and the way i was before
all of this started, but i was only nine.
and i’ve got murder in my bloodstream and personality disorders
and addictions and depression and i just want this to be over,
but until i get help i’ll probably never change.
i hate these trite and shallow songs but they’re all that i can write,
because i’ve got nowhere else to let this out and there’s no end in sight,
so just bear with me and i swear, oh i swear it won’t take long.
and it’s hard to be around you because my smile’s so fucking heavy,
and it’s hard to hold it up all day without feeling so unsteady,
but i have to leave here before i can let it go.
and if you never really knew this or you wish you’d never learned,
i’m still the smiling child i’ve always been, as far as you’re concerned,
just don’t look through me and i’ll always be around
i hate these trite and shallow songs but they’re all that i can write,
because i’ve got nowhere else to let this out and there’s no end in sight,
so just bear with me and i swear it’ll all be over soon.
Beautifully played and full of moving vocal performances, the Bay Area singer/songwriter's latest is a stellar work of art. Bandcamp Album of the Day Feb 3, 2023
Lila Tristram’s ASMR-like approach to singing gets a worthy match in the lush and luxurious arrangements of The Last Dinosaur. Bandcamp New & Notable Feb 4, 2023